April 30, 2010

Daydreaming

On my way home from the gym I suddenly discovered that I've been daydreaming all my life. I remember denying this fact in the past, rationalizing that I wasn't fantasizing per se. But I think the definition is not that limited. Daydreaming is more like being somewhere else in my head, without fully being where I am at the moment or paying attention to details. It's like my body is here but my mind isn't.
Of course when I'm required to focus, I very well can. But when not engaged in particular tasks, I'm drifting away, nowhere in particular, leaving my body to move by itself.
Maybe that's one of the reasons why I haven't enjoyed life to the fullest. How could I if I haven't even been here? Everything around me has been passing by and the only things retained in my memory were perceptions, feelings, and emotions. Colors, shapes, sizes, places, people... gone.
Maybe it was my psyche's natural way of escape and rest. Regardless, if I want to enhance my life, I need to come back where my body is, paying attention to the life now, see the beauty and wonder right here. It's almost like an awakening that brings so much energy and joy.

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