July 31, 2011


Life gives us choices. Sometimes, these choices are easy to make, but sometimes they are not. When doubt emerges, it looks like a helper at first, but when it lasts for a long time, it's a poison. If doubt prevents us from making a productive choice, we tend to make a choice to linger in the middle, which rarely brings satisfaction. It's a stalled position that creates no growth, only turmoil. We may think, "Well, I like the choice A, but I also like the choice B. I can't just let any of them go. I want to choose both." So we fool ourselves by thinking that we chose both, whereas in reality we chose none. Life continues to be lived half-heartedly.
At some point, we realize that sitting on two chairs simultaneously isn't working. We're faced with the same choice again. A or B? Damn, it's still hard. But this time, we approach the dilemma with awareness that only one must be chosen. Whether we feel it's fair or not, limited or not, doesn't change the fact. Either A or B. A or B. There's no AB. Here comes our live's uncomfortable moment, when we risk to be drastically mistaken. Or we risk to terribly miss something that we left behind and thus experience some pain. One thing I'm beginning to realize: One can't live a fulfilling life without taking risks when they are called for. So the choice now is: A fulfilling life or non-fulfilling life? We can't have both.

July 4, 2011


It has been raining and thundering in Florida for a while now. Every day it's raining and the sun comes out randomly whenever it pleases, if it pleases. After a while, it started to become annoying. Couldn't go out anytime I wanted. Couldn't go to the pool whenever (not that I planned to swim anyway...). Yesterday, I found out that many states in the US suffered from the lack of rain and the result was lack of water for many cities. That totally switched my perspective and I felt a bit guilty for not appreciating nature as it presented itself. I have been too concerned about my own comfort. Sometimes, Life does the work for us, providing a larger perspective on things; but sometimes, we have to do this work ourselves, without external reminders. I guess, once again, I will tell myself that things happen for a reason and whatever is happening is for my own advantage, whether I realize it or not.


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